How a mom's decision to work influenced her child with disabilities

   When  I was younger I had a friend  who was also disabled we  grew up in Elementary school  as included students in the main stream classes.


   Her mom was  a stay at home mom during the week. My mom worked a ton.  More than my dad.


 Growing up I hated this  I  wanted a mom t hat would pick me up from school  take me to therapies  drs appointments  and everything else that is involved for as a child with special needs .  Lucky  I had a great nanny who helped  raise my sisters and me  

I  always  said   " I wish you could be  a stay at home mom like   { the classmates mom}



 Now  on the eve on my graduation from JC   I am  glad that she worked.   She was able to make a difference in the lives of others, first as doctor then  as  vice chancellor, her curent physician

 My mom and me basketball tournament 2013

 More importantly I learned how be independent   I learned how to do my homework myself. I learned how to be assertive in the doctors offices.


 Once my baby sitter left  three years ago. I learned how  to

  Set my alarm

Get to the bus on time

 I learned how to make things to eat  like my dinner Saturday night  a can of beans

    On Saturday I  walked to  track practice  because my mom was  working

 I learned how to go to the bank  and get money out.

 Do I know all the skills  I need to know to live independently? Nope  but I  will and  my mom will be there  I leaned these things  because  my mom worked so it was up to me to learn how to advocate for myself   I  did not have to look far for an inspiration because  as a black women  leader my mom is an advocate.    As  I grow into  a advocate  her stories of  courage and wisdom will guide me and for that I am grateful.
  I  love you mom happy belated  Mother's Day 

Yesterday

  I Finally submitted my college applications inclusion does work


 Sorry  guys  I  have been  missing in action  a lot of exciting things are coming up   i  promise including the rest of Able to go to College  school has  been  crazy  busy  but  I  have not forgotten about  you guys  so  hang in their and I will  blog more soon.

Gavin David Leong the Fallen Supper Hero: A boy who will never be six

      He is a boy  who will never be six. 

He is a boy  who will never cuddle  with his mom,

  Sit with his dad,  

Or   play with his brother,  

 He is a boy who will never be six.

He is a boy who left this earth too soon.

 He is a boy who  made a difference. 

 He was a  boy who did not need to  pretend to be a supper hero,

 because he was   

He is a boy who will never be six. 

   Experts say he was deaf, 

 but he heard  his mother's voice. 

 Experts said that he never walked

  Yet,

 on December ,12 ,2012 he  walked across the kitchen floor.

 Experts said  he was not going to learn much 

 Yet he understood how  to hit a switch to ask for water

 He was a fallen hero . 

A boy who will never be six. 

OH God  how I hope and pray 

that you surround his family with love and grace 

 helping them feel in place 

 with their supper hero gone 

 A boy who  will never be six

 He will never be forgotten,  

 never 
ever 
erased.

I never knew this hero,

 I met him online .

Everyday I would read his stories 

on his family blog 

Chasing Rainbows .

I met him 

Meny met him 

 He touched so many lives 

 Like heros do. 

Gavin 

Oh Gavin 

David Leong .I   mourn  for you

 You were so brave 

 and so true.

 There is nothing that I  wouldn't  do to support your family

 ED,   Kate, and Brain 

 You will always have a place in my heart  along with Gavin

  Know  guys that  the  cyber special needs community

Morns with you.

We mourn  for a boy.  
Moans for a boy who did not  have to pretend he was hero. 

 because he was a supper hero.

 A boy who will never be six.

Rest in Peace Gavin.   

My Best friends and a fallen hero

 

FOR GAVIN 

 Growing up.  I  never had solid friendships   A  tall  black  feisty  stubbon hard  headed  disabled  girl was the last person kids wanted to befriend .  When  I was  15  I  started reading blogs, and that  summer  I    started  my own blog.   I have been blogging online ever since ,  I also have  found good friendships with  amazing  people  all connected to  one thing, disability. Over the years  I have met numerous  women , and men who have become  my friends. They have read my blog  and  commented and  I have  read   and commented on their blogs.


 One  such person  is  Kate Leong.    She  has had it hard.  Her  oldest son  has CP  Her youngest has had to overcome a speech  impairment and penut allergy.     Her oldest son, Gavin  David Lenog died tonight after having  heart  problems.   I have  watched her Facebook post since  Wednesday, the day he got sick,  hoping that  he would pull through.  Unfortunately he was pronounced brain dead.   He was  Five   and a half.   He is a  little boy who will never live to be six.


  My Aunt came to town this weekend  and   I  was  happy to see them.  On Friday Gavin took a turn for the  worse.  I read about it  as  i  had a meeting   with my  school DSPS program.  I felt like  I was in a fog. I  had hope that  Gavin  would pull through. I  told  my consular about it.  My speech therapist about it my parents  my aunt.  I have    had  the pic above to honor him.

  I feel pain  for a kid I  never "met"  because of the blog spere. I  may not have met  him in person because  he lived  across  the country   I   knew  he loved music . I was happy  when  he started to walk around  Christmass last year . And I was thrilled when  just last week  he used a switch to say I want water  at school.  Then  this   happend. I am soo  mad at God.  Kate has  already  had a still  born.  She had been trying for  more  kids   without fail and  now  her super hero is  gone.   I do not understand why god makes  life so hard for people. I am  soo mad. Please  keep   this  family in your prayers,

 For any of you longtime  readers  please know that you have been my greatest friends.   A  special  shout out  to  Ellen ,  Kate ,  Jan , Nicole,  Michelle,  Debby, Shannon , Tim, Rick and  those who  I forget  thank-you  for reading  and  inviting me into your homes  and   share  your kids with me.  You may be older then  me; however you are my best  friends .    Kate  you  are amazing  thanks for sharing Gavin's  story  with me and countless others.  I   hope you can find  peace on this difficult day.
 Kate  this  picture is  for you.

News at home

            Hay  guys  I am back,  As  I type this today , Sunday,  its the last day of  spring break  so  its  back into  school and stuff  and blogging.

               First I can  not help post   these  cute pics of  me and my Dog on World CP Day.   I  made these using a cool app  called    Pic
Stich

  Over break   my family got a new car.

 And I  have only have three classes now.   One classI was behind in and the other one  well  i do not  want to go into details here yet  but I am still upset.  So  now  I am going to try and apply to a college with some  Withdrawals  so  it will be interesting to see i  if i get in.   Now that I have some time I should be able to  put my application in  within the week.  Exciting stuff.   How have you  guys been? Do you like my   new blog  header  let me  know  in the comments 

Happy Easter

What would you say to a new parent in honor of national CP Day

 CP did not prevent me from being a cute baby

   So today is the  day to  go green to honor those  like me who live  with CP.   To celebrate  I  have asked  some people on Facebook.  what advice they would give to a new parent  who just received  a CP  diagnoses.   Here is what they  said. 

  First I asked in a CP group on facebook

 "That no matter what she needs to remember that regardless of the"Label" her child  is still her child the same as yesterday and nothing will change that , and though therapy etc is important, so is being a kid - remember to still have plan old FUN!"

  Fall 1999  swinging away

"Cp does not give you limits, live life to its fullest "

 




"Your child has cp, they are not cp. it is simply a part of who they are,its does no define them"





 "Expect your child to be able to do everything(albit on an extend timeline) until she clearly shows that she just isn't  physically capable  if doing it. If you want other to treat your child like they're any " normal kid then you a s the parent need to treat her that way"


 "For me.. I wish someone had told me to work on his communication. That milestones will be there just different ones. Its Ok to cry and it's ok to ask for help. treating them normal is so important.. [my son]is not able to walk.. but I always put him on the floor to play.. he would roll around.. sometimes whacking his head on the roll cause he didn't have the control at

  cousins  may 2012

 first.. but he didn't cry so I didn't make a fuss. because I treated him like any other kid.. he know is a pro at rolling.. he even log rolled, pushed him self from his room into the back yard to get to his puppy.. he's a normal kid.. with a few hiccups he's working out."

"Remember Dr's are practicing for a reason. I personally will not get a surgery without talking to people who have experienced it before. I was told, "If it sounds too good to be true, look into it, it might just be."


" You still have the same child you had before the diagnosis..."

I  then asket my mom  and she said 

"I would tell them to be thankful for their child and prepared for the amazement of the power of unconditional love. Your child will teach you many life lessons and demonstrate the strength and resolve of the human spirit. With  AZ, I learn every day just how amazing she is!"

 

I also asked other people with  CP  ( cause  we are the experts  right ) 

"it's not the end of the world, and your child is whole and perfect just the way they are:)" 

 piano concert spring 1998

"just to love the child as much as you would without the cp, and the biggest thing is even though it's important to listen to doctors, don't let the doctors tell you the future of the child. help the child reach it's full potential no matter what that may be."

  My thoughts 

  Aloha  Spring 2000

  Assume that    your child can understand.   Know that  raising your child  will have its ups and downs.  your kid will bring  you moments of laughter and moments of joy and  that they are not  broken  and  do not  need to  be fixed.   Also know that your not alone millons of other families are dealing with CP  as well.